Xander Walther, Head of Video
@xanderwcourant
Malek Sidani, Reporter
@mmscourant
The Coronavirus pandemic, and the ensuing national quarantine, is certainly a once in a lifetime event. A time filled with worry, paranoia, and uncertainty. Brave souls wander deserted streets, with their masks tightly fastened. It’s all any dog walker can do to step outside without feeling like Will Smith in Legendary. As for parents, getting drunk is no longer a privilege after a hard day’s work, but a necessity for getting through a hard day’s work. Sleep schedules are a thing of the past. Students show up to “school” in pajamas. Riots have even broken out in certain states, from angry protesters fighting fiercely for their right to both contract potentially deadly illnesses, and of course, spread them. Minimum wage “essential workers” are being praised as heroes for selflessly endangering themselves in the midst of this chaos. “Honestly, I don’t do it for me,” said one such inspiring subway worker “I just do it for my mortgage. You’d be surprised how many foot longs people order during a nation-wide lock down.”
Many restaurants have been forced to serve only takeout due to an effort to enforce social distancing, a precautionary measure that was originally ignored by many Gen Z teenagers as evident in too many Snapchat stories. As the pandemic progressed, international lockdowns became essential to protect the rapid spread of the virus. With the US ranking number one in deaths and cases of Coronavirus, reluctance to isolation was cause for the closing of all schools in New York City, followed by a legal requirement to wear masks in public. In New Canaan, those who are daring enough to go outside are either following by example and wearing a mask for the safety of others or “exercising their right” to breathe comfortably while endangering others. The argument revolves around whether or not a mask should be worn while remaining at a minimum distance of six feet apart. Another argument amongst teenagers is how long schools will remain closed, which has an ever changing answer.
Either way, it’s important to step up and do your part. Beating Coronavirus can be done in leisure by following the guide below.
- HAVE THE RIGHT MINDSET
- What comes to mind when you hear, sleep in, leave early, no homework? The seemingly impossible hat-trick? Not anymore. Every day is a seamless combination of each one! Of course it’s not perfect considering there are some obstacles such as boredom, loneliness and a sense of impending doom with nothing to fill the void… moving on to step two.
- The second step to having the right mindset is acceptance because let’s face it, those other four aren’t applicable. Try to see this as a fun, new chance to learn and live differently, instead of what it actually is, which is a nation wide lockdown due to a global pandemic.
- GET COMFORTABLE AND ENJOY THE BENEFITS
- Now that you’ve got the right mindset, relax. Remember how excited you were about pajama day? Everyday can be pajama day with even more benefits!
- Enjoy a bonus hour of sleep. Wear whatever you want, whenever you want. Work with a friend during class. There’s no homework, providing countless hours for you to binge Ozark and then follow up with Outer Banks. What more could you ask for?
- This whole thing is basically just a super long weekend… except you have hours of schoolwork… and you can’t go anywhere… or see anyone in person.
- USE YOUR TIME PRODUCTIVELY, or at the very least pretend that you are.
- With this lockdown comes a great gift; an unprecedented amount of free time. USE IT!
- Write that book, finally pick up your dad’s old guitar you’ve been eyeing, get back into shape, or at the very least dream about such productivity while you lie by the pool tanning.
- TRY TO IGNORE THE SIGNS THAT THE WORLD IS ENDING
- Even cities have been turned to ghost towns. Streets are mostly empty, spare a few lost souls wearing Mad-Max esque gas masks.
- A breed of hornets dubbed “murder hornets” that are potentially deadly to humans has appeared in the US.
- On top of that 81 celebrities have died this year including Kobe Bryant, Rocky “Soul Man” Johnson, and Terry Jones, founder of the Monty Python comedy group.
- PICK UP THAT GPA!
- With no homework and limitless time, no excuse can prevent you from becoming an exemplary scholar… or a B+ student.
- Perhaps the best thing about quarantine, at least in my opinion, is that all the tests are open-note. All of them.
- REALIZE NONE OF THIS IS ALL THAT BAD
- Four hours of class, an hour of passing time, a twenty-five minute at-home lunch break, and literally no homework… it’s later start times, minus every single con.
- Other than that, all you have to do is stay inside, or at the very least keep your distance. It’s easy. Don’t EVEN try to pretend you weren’t spending hours binging Netflix before this all started.
