Kit Clemente
Opinions Editor
Every NCHS student knows one thing above all: the quarter system is an invention of satan. And with each quarter comes new surprises, new ups (and downs,) and new devices of torture imposed upon us by the likes of teachers, assignments, and due dates. Plus, with the now nefarious creation that is the openbook PowerSchool system, tracking the trajectory (and probably downward trajectory) of grades throughout the year is just so lovely. Now let’s break down how this process inflicts pain upon the student body in more detail:
Q1: On the first day of school, the sun-kissed student body invades the hallways, (maybe) a little excited to see who’s in their classes, how cool their new teachers are, and which classes they’re going to like the best (or work the least in.) And those 200+ pages of history notes, random scientific journal readings and mandatory literature analysis summer homework, which were hurriedly done on sandy shores while listening to new and snazzy summer playlists (probably filled with some Shwayze,) well nah, they’re not gonna end up being a big deal; it’s all good in the hood! That is until the brutal wake up call: SUPRISE! The summer work (which you got a 75 percent on) is half of the Q1 grade, and all the summer work information has been compiled into a test which is TOMORROW. Cue the spiral into hell. Q1 lesson: beach to classroom dungeons…always rough. Prep yourselves for the buckle down, kids!
Q2: Looking at Q2, it seems like smooth sailing. Thanksgiving, then winter holiday break, ah what a breeze, so much downtime! Surely Q2 will be filled with pumpkin pie chowdowns, ugly Christmas sweaters and frolicking in the snowfall, making snowmen and sipping on hot cocoa and peppermint mocha lattes. But true to form, the lovely perception of Q2 dissolves after the last day of winter break when the apocalypse descends and the disturbing realization occurs, prompted by a heart-attack-inducing word: midterms. Suddenly those peppermint lattes are replaced by black coffees and all-nighters in preparation for half the year’s calculus work you didn’t do.
*Q3: Midterms have passed, the icy New England winter is thawing (no longer covering your car in half a feet of snow or inch of frost on a regular basis,) and spring is right around the corner; all is right in the world! After-school events include early suntanning (if you’re as pale as me, you’ll need all the sun you can get,) cheering with Bussey’s Bomb Squad at lax games, and chattering outside Zumbachs while sipping on iced coffees. But in the spirit of ying-yang, the good is soon countered by the atrocious presence of swiftly approaching AP tests, SAT IIs, and, for those most unfortunate students, SATs or ACTs. True to form, waves of assignments, tests (hello a test on everyday of the week!) will ensue, constituting what I like to call the “end of the quarter crush.” (But let’s be real, it’s more a tsunami.) And to add to the absurdity, the influx of work just so happens to be an enormously ridiculous amount of your final grade, as Q3 is very short. A short period of complete anarchy, that is.
*Q4: At this point, every student begins glancing out windows, going off almost every other free (or, for those most dedicated, almost every other period,) and planning summer adventures, activities and anxiously counting down the days until the last day of school. Finals? Psh. Who cares about what those things are when the sun is glistening outside?! Carpe diem people!! But this attitude soon proves futile because all that carpe diem-ing, well let’s just say that probably doesn’t help during un grand examen de français. Whoops! Course this causes a spiral into hell as cramming occurs to save what remains of your GPA on the other demonic finals to come. Let’s just say, it’s not a wonder why no one ever comes to the last day of school; they’re still fuming about the injustice that was their history final.
Oh, how lovely, time to do it all over again! (Now I know you’re saying this time it will be different, this time you’re gonna study for all those midterms and finals, and really buckle down to bear the “end of quarter crush.” All I have to say is those with this viewpoint most definitely believe the age old argument that the “glass is half full.” Good luck.)
**For all those seniors out there: skip Q3, Q4. This is a time of celebration, sleep, and transition. Oh, and a time for laughing at all underclassmen and that faint foe called “work.” The quarter gods are repaying you for all those times they made you weep from injustice. You’re welcome.
