KG’s indispensable guide to navigating high school

Kate Gilhool
Associate Editor

Dear Freshmen,

You may have been the big fish at Saxe, but that doesn’t relay over here. Here are three golden rules, otherwise known as the ‘unwritten rules of NCHS.’ We’ve all been in your position, but unlike you, we were not given the heads up that you new arrivals are about to read.

1. Lounge.

The Lounge gives you many opportunities to fail; so feel free to sit next to one of the upperclassmen either outside on their patio or just hop up on that aluminum looking ledge that juniors inhabit. They will love the attention they’re getting from you first timers, and the stories about a clueless freshman coming over to their ‘section in the lounge’ will be reminisced for days.

TIP: Stay on your side, in your section. Even Big Bob (GUY WHO SITS IN LOUNGE/WEARS SWEATPANTS AND BUTTON DOWN?!) cringes when he sees someone in unchartered territory, but he won’t do anything to help you if your backpack is nuggeted due to lack of responsibility.

TIP For Juniors: If you can’t manage to hoist yourself up onto the ledge, position your backpack or a large object as a stepping stone, and if that takes too much effort feel free to stand awkwardly next to all of your friends that are on the ledge thinking about how great it would be to sit up there with them.

Try to impress a table by proving your assertiveness and confidence by sitting down with a nice heaping plate of whatever hot lunch is being served that day, in order to show your table mates or if you’re sitting alone, your onlookers that you have the confidence to eat a large meal alone in front of your fellow classmates.

TIP: Keep it light and the chicken tenders are for boys. ONLY. Although feel free to pig out on Pasta Friday without being judged.

Really, beg an upperclassman with a license to take you off campus. Odds are they’d love to risk their off campus ‘privileges’ just for your entertainment as well as to introduce you to the infamous 7 eleven man behind the cash register.

TIP: Leave it to an over accessible mom, dad or nanny to pick up your Robeks, and for future references 7 eleven does offer the greatest deals on slushies.

2. Navigating your way around the halls.

Seriously, during a mid morning rush people love to pilot themselves around freshman tea parties in the hallway gabbing about encounters with upperclassmen. Well, you’ll have a few more if you don’t step out of the way.

TIP: Save it for later frosh.

#Whereisjackatchueandhishumannetwhenweneedone?

3. Bathroom.

Try to slip in during the middle of a class in order to avoid a line; it’s your best bet. Guys, it’s not elementary school anymore. You can refrain from buddying up to go to the bathroom, and while in there do NOT look down and keep your gaze straight in front of you to avoid peeping tom status.

TIP: It’s embarrassing enough to be alone with one person you barely know in the bathroom, but sitting in a stall next to a rando would not be the time to talk or introduce yourself.

These are just a few highlighted rules, but you will be sure to learn the rest as your time here at NCHS progresses. Good luck, use your best judgment, and soon enough you little rams will be making your own rules!

Sincerely,

KG